I Know We’ve Suffered Through Three Bad G.I. Joe Movies, But Here’s Why I Think We Deserve (Another) Reboot

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I loved G.I. Joe toys as a kid, so I recently rewatched the three movies that came out over the past twenty years on Paramount+. Unfortunately, I still don’t think they’re very good. Honestly, I barely remembered seeing them the first time – they just weren’t memorable at all. They weren’t just bad movies, they were instantly forgettable.

After watching *G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra* (2009), *G.I. Joe: Retaliation* (2013), and the reboot *Snake Eyes: G.I. Joe Origins* (2021), I realized what’s been holding the movie franchise back. I believe the *G.I. Joe* story, based on the popular toy line, deserves another try on the big screen, because it hasn’t been done right yet.

There Was Too Much Superhero, Not Enough War Film, In All Three

What bothers me most about the *G.I. Joe* movies is how they changed the team from a highly skilled military unit-as presented in the original toy line-into a group of superheroes. In the first film, *G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra*, characters like Duke and Ripcord are given special suits that make them incredibly powerful, allowing them to do things like avoid speeding vehicles and smash through structures. It’s not enough that they’re already exceptionally talented; the movies make them nearly indestructible.

While the dialogue and special effects aren’t always great, I enjoy the sci-fi elements of the weapons and vehicles, particularly those used by Cobra – they really stay true to the original toys and cartoons. I can even handle the over-the-top action. What bothers me most is when characters start displaying unrealistic superpowers, like Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow, or the advanced suits from the first movie. It feels out of place.

The sequel, *G.I. Joe: Retaliation*, improves on the first film by making the action sequences more realistic for highly trained soldiers, rather than relying on superhuman abilities. However, a significant portion of the movie still centers around the characters Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow (played by Ray Park and Lee Byung-hun). Even so, some moments, like Storm Shadow blocking a bullet with his sword, feel unbelievable.

There Is Too Much Focus On Snake Eyes And Storm Shadow

As a fan, I have to say the three *G.I. Joe* movies really leaned too heavily into the whole Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow rivalry. I’ll admit, Snake Eyes wasn’t ever my favorite character from the cartoon, so maybe I’m a little biased, but it felt like the movies got way too caught up in explaining how those two became enemies instead of focusing on the bigger picture.

The first two *G.I. Joe* movies and the recent *Snake Eyes: G.I. Joe Origins* all spend a lot of time showing the characters’ backstories and ninja training. Despite the first two films not being successful with audiences or critics, the franchise repeated the same approach with *Snake Eyes*, starring Henry Golding and Andrew Koji. It feels repetitive and unnecessary. All three movies seem overly focused on being martial arts films, and it doesn’t quite work.

Both characters are essentially superheroes with a unique weakness: only each other can harm them. Also, building a whole franchise around a silent, masked character like Snake Eyes doesn’t seem like a strong foundation. While some people believe Snake Eyes was a good choice for a reboot, I don’t share that opinion.

The Movies Tried To Be Way Too Much

Throughout the three films, the series struggled to commit to a single genre. It tried to be a war movie, a superhero story, a Kung Fu action film, and a science fiction adventure all at once. This inconsistency is jarring and makes the movies feel disjointed as they constantly switch between different styles. The original toy line was fundamentally about soldiers, and the best approach – as the military saying goes – is to keep things simple. The focus should be on the soldiers and their conflict with the terrorist group, COBRA.

The movie feels like a chaotic mix of fast-paced scenes, as if the filmmakers were trying out different genres without settling on one. This approach doesn’t succeed, and the film ultimately falls flat. If they had focused on making a strong war movie, staying true to the spirit of the original cartoons, it likely would have been much more successful and appealed to fans.

I Also Went Back And Rewatched Some Of The Original Cartoons

Growing up, one of my favorite things to do after school was watch the *G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero* cartoons. I loved them even more than *He-Man and the Masters of the Universe*, and I usually spent my allowance money on G.I. Joe action figures. It’s been decades since I last watched an episode, though.

I was curious if I still remembered the old G.I. Joe series as well as I thought, so I decided to rewatch a few episodes through my Prime subscription. And I definitely do! What struck me is that while there’s sci-fi and a super-skilled team constantly fighting COBRA, they weren’t exactly *superheroes*. Snake Eyes might be the exception, but mostly, they felt like incredibly well-trained, elite soldiers – grounded in at least a little bit of realism.

The G.I. Joe series has a rich history with many exciting stories across its cartoons and comics. It features a large cast of characters and memorable villains. I was hoping the 2021 reboot would explore individual character backstories, similar to how many superhero franchises are built, eventually leading to a team-up. However, the movie instead focused on Snake Eyes, a character whose origin story was already well-known.

To revive the *G.I. Joe* franchise, the solution seems simple: focus on a realistic, large-scale war film. Instead of giving the Joes superpowers, portray them as highly skilled soldiers. And a crossover with the *Transformers*? It’s unnecessary and should be avoided.

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2025-09-26 17:44